Let's talk Lubricant

Lubricant is defined as a substance introduced between two moving surfaces to reduce friction, heat, and wear/damage. Let’s take a closer look and see how that applies to the realm of sexual health and wellness.

All personal lubricants are made using one of three bases: silicone, water or oil. How do you know which kind of lubricant to get? Which one will suit you? I am so glad you asked. Let me introduce you to your new best friends, let’s get to know each one and see which one you should bring along on your sexy adventures.

Water-based - The MVP

Water-based lube is your all-rounder, up for everything, loves everyone. Water-based is safe for use with toys of all materials, safe for use with condoms, and generally pH balanced (except if there is other flavours or additives). It is also easy to wash out of bedlinen or clothing. So pretty much any activity you can think of, water-based is up for it. 

The only problem we can find is it can become too sticky. Since water is absorbed by the top layer of skin, it leaves the lube sticky and less viscous. This means reapplication is needed, which is not always convenient. The other problem is some can find it too ‘watery’, for want of a better word. It can be very frustrating when your lube doesn’t stay where you need it to stay!

Silicone - The ride or die

Ah silicone. This lube will hang around you through thick or thin. Because silicone molecules are too big to absorb into the skin, it just sits on the surface. This means it doesn’t disappear or go sticky and is very long-lasting. All-nighter anyone? ;)

Silicone-based lube is great for play in water environments; think shower, bath, swimming pool, because it does not get washed away with the water. We love a friend with staying power! Silicone is also safe for use with condoms and is hypoallergenic so great for those with sensitive skin.

The only problem we have with silicone is the fact it can degrade silicone toys. This means it creates tiny abrasions in the surface of the silicone toy, where bacteria can get trapped and grow. Definitely not good for your body or your toys.

Oil-based - The fair weather friend

Oil has its moments. It is very long-lasting, so no need for reapplication. Oil-based lube can also double as a massage oil, which can be convenient. 

However. 

Oil-based is not recommended for use with condoms as it will degrade the latex, increasing the risk of rips and tears. Oil stains bedding and clothing, making clean-up more difficult.

Oil-based lube has also been associated with higher rates of candida. 

 

Hybrid - the all-rounder

Hybrid is the lubricant example of the phrase “why not both”? It is generally formulated on a water or aloe vera base, with a small percentage of silicone added. This adds the long-lasting ability water-based lubes don’t have, and hybrid is able to be reactivated if it gets sticky with a small amount of water or saliva instead of having to reapply. Because the percentage of silicone is quite small, it is possible to be suitable for silicone toys. A patch test is recommended to be certain, results may vary.

 

What about “natural” lubes?

I am sure you have heard of all the natural alternatives out there, such as aloe vera and coconut oil. The advantage of these is they can be used with toys made from all materials. But these are not as long lasting as other options out there, and can still be irritating for sensitive skin.

Coconut oil, for example is a popular choice. While it is technically safe for skin and can be classified as vegan, it can still compromise condoms as it is an oil which will degrade latex. If you choose these options please be mindful of cross contamination. Do not use a jar of coconut oil you use for cooking in the bedroom! Your after-dark activities deserve a jar just for them. Keep things sanitary also by using a spoon or similar tool to scoop so you are preventing fingers from contaminating the jar. 

 

How do I find the right one??

Generally if you are looking for a lube, here at Confessions the first thing we will do is ask questions. What kind of activity is the lube going to be used for? Is there barrier contraceptive use i.e condoms? What toys or other sexual aids will be used? Is there a history of candida/yeast infections, uti, skin irritation such as eczema or general sensitivity? Any allergies to food or other ingredients?  All of these are factors in choosing the correct lube for the job.

Please, whatever you do, do not use things like butter, baby oil, body or hand lotion/moisturiser or petroleum jelly. These are not designed to be around your genitals. Making the effort to use the right lube for the job will always pay off in enjoyment and satisfaction.

 

 Other things about lube that feel a bit illegal to know..

You can buy pH test strips from a pharmacy to test the pH of a lubricant. Often products don’t have this information on their packaging, and it is a good way to potentially see if a lube will irritate you. Vaginal pH is 3.8-4.5, and anal pH is more like 7.0. Aiming for around these levels means you are less likely to be irritated.

Silicone lube makes a great anti-chafe treatment. Think about it, it is designed to reduce friction, which is what chafe is. So, all you thick thigh baddies, try it out and thank me later.

Silicone lube is also fantastic as an anti-frizz/smoothing hair serum. Hear me out, check your hair serum. Does it contain dimethicone? That’s a type of silicone. It is used in hair and beauty products to lock in moisture. It is also the main ingredient in silicone-based lubricants..just saying.

For that same reason, locking in moisture, silicone lube can also step in as a makeup primer. As it sits on the surface of the skin and doesn’t get absorbed, it means your makeup won’t settle into any fine lines or wrinkles. I know, you’re welcome. And don’t worry, silicone is non-comedogenic. This means the molecules still let air through when they are sitting on the surface of your skin, so low risk of clogging pores or getting acne.

There is no such thing as too much lube for anal! The rectum does not produce its own lubrication, therefore the tissue is highly prone to injury from friction. You might prefer something with a thicker texture for butt stuff, so it stays where you need it to be and doesn’t drip everywhere. Silicone or hybrid lubes are much longer lasting for this.

You can use lubricant to make condoms feel more pleasurable and comfortable. Please make sure it is not an oil-based lube to keep the latex from breaking down. Using a drop of lubricant inside the condom, as well as the outside helps reduce the friction for everyone and makes everything so much more pleasurable.

 

There is no one reason to need or want to use lube. It could be for masturbation, play with a partner, or even just as a personal moisturiser. Regardless of the reason, rest assured that we are here to help.